Javi's Journey Through Dreadful Dating

So, this post is going to be a little different. Don't worry, I have plenty of dating stories still left to share with you guys. I also have some other issue posts to write including topics like bi-erasure. Trust me, this journey is very much just getting started and there are plenty of stops along the way. See, in this post I decided to get a little bit more personal with you guys with how I've been feeling lately. I figure if I'm going to blog and share my journey that I should share as much of my journey that I feel will resonate with my readers. I think story telling is the best way to connect with humans. Like my last post stated, this journey of being human is about getting to feel every emotion and I think we can best do it by storytelling. And, by sharing I hope that people out there go from feeling alone to feeling connected--even if it means embarrassing myself in the process. Trust me, after ripping your pants or shorts in front of people on a few occasions,

One of my favorite shows for a period of time was Glee. Yeah, yeah, I know, shocker. But, I will say that the first season was great; the second was alright; the third was meh; the fourth picked things up, the firth, well I don't know what really happened there; but the sixth was just gold all over again. Yes, I watched every season. Several times over. I'll even be honest and say I was an active editor on the glee wiki page. Let's all move on from the judgment now. Anyway, one of the cornerstones of Glee was the meaning behind what the actual word glee meant. But, as you watched the show, you realized that Glee was much more than just joy. It was also anger. Sadness. Regret. Hope. Loss. Pain. New Beginnings. Love. What opening yourself up to joy really meant was opening yourself to every single human emotion. It was never going to be easy or expected, but by opening yourself up to joy you could open yourself up to a life that had been lived. And just like

One of my favorite shows is Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. Seriously, if you haven't watched it, go watch it after reading this. I'd normally say go watch it all before finishing this, but it's too good for me to compete against. Can't have you guys being disappointed with my stuff after. Seriously, it's that good. What I got from Crazy Ex was one of my favorite songs that I really can connect with. No, not that one . This one: And it's absolutely true. Life does not make narrative sense. Everything just seems so random and barely put together. And in online dating it makes even less sense. Because here we were the weekend Chris was supposed to be here and no messages from him. Like the entire Friday he was supposed to fly out, I was on pins and needles. When was he gonna message me? Was he gonna call? Was I supposed to pick him up from the airport? Would he randomly show up at my apartment even though he didn't know where I lived but Seattle doesn't have

Okay, so I left you all in suspense for a while....I should apologize, but that just means you guys will stick around for the conclusion of this tale. When we last got together , we were just meeting Chris and things were going great! I was smitten and he was a smooth goofball. However, I didn't know him at all. Sure, we chatted briefly and he tried to talk me up like he'd won the lottery just by running into me, but I really didn't know him. Hell, just reading the first post you guys would know as much about him as I knew. And here he was a few months later telling me that he was going to take a vacation to visit me. So as soon as he told me that he had a vacation planned, I halted everything. We were going way too fast. We'd only been talking for a brief time and there's no way a week or so of vacation was reasonable. And I told him so. There was just no way this was going to happen when we didn't know anything about each other. And I have t

Online dating is a huge gamble. You never know what's going to happen or who you're going to run into. I've run into professors, friends, and even people's husbands. Yeah, I know. Don't worry, there will be time for those stories as well. However, while you might meet many people there's also the biggest possibility. You're not going to meet anyone. Getting ghosted is a terrible experience. What's worse about getting ghosted is when you've offered all the goodies and get ghosted. You see, when that happens every single thought runs through your mind. Was I ugly? Boring? Were they just fishing for pics? Am I going to die alone? Seriously, there have only been a few times in my life when I've completely questioned my abilities. Once was when I didn't get into UC Berkeley, my dream school. Another was when I caved and hooked up with a friend and neither one of us came. And about two years ago, it was with Taylor. I matched with

So, welcome to another multi-part story. These are fun, right? I rip off all the bandages and we all do some group therapy together. I've actually debated about posting this one or not. Why, you ask? Because no one likes looking like a complete fool. It's fun putting yourself out there, but like, really putting yourself out there when you have egg on your face? So, it took me a while from going from ranting FB post, to fully coherent explanation. But, we're here folks. I'm excited, scared, and my tummy rumbling (so, that last one might be because of prune juice, but whatever). I will say, other than hesitating because I had egg on my face, I hesitated sharing this story for a few other reasons. First, because I never have time to write. Second, every good story has some suspense to build it up. Finally, because even looking back on it I'm still just shooketh that it happened. So, strap yourselves in, grab some churros, and let's go on this journey of

A large part of online dating is being prepared for the unexpected. Sometimes you'll find a perfect match and the subsequent conversation will be amazing, then there are times when the conversation is just awkward, and then there's the pop-up dick pic. Be careful with the last one, those are wild, unavoidable, and always from the one's you NEVER want it from.* I think a good chunk of the fun of online dating is the very fact of the above reality. You can't predict what the other person's first move is going to be. Now, I will state up from, for the most part, my greetings are pretty tame. I might call someone a stud to be saucy, but that's about it. Some might find that boring, but you know what Janet and Julio, I like being boring at the beginning. I think it leaves for a wider selection of conversation topics. Besides, I usually shoot off the first greeting, so I never really know what mood I'm in. Am I chill? Anxious? Ready to pounce? In the mood?

In case you've been living under a rock for the past year, or like me have an ever growing list of movies and shows to get through (hey, if you do have some recommendations send them my way, I'll get to them), you might not know that 2018 saw Netflix roll out a crap-ton of teen rom-coms. And honestly, who doesn't love a good teen rom-com? All the emotions are ramped up to 11. Everything is life or death. And, I get to relive the glorious trauma and flashbacks of my Senior Prom over and over again. Trust me, seeing flat-assed suburban kids trying to shake it to some Pussycat Dolls is pretty scarring. One of my favorite 2018 teen movies was: To All the Boys I've Loved Before. You should definitely check it out as well as the book, of the same name. Seriously, stop reading this post now and go read and watch it and then come back. Okay, good. We're on the same page now. Seriously, it's a cute story. The movie, which I may or may not have already seen like 6