Javi's Journey Through Dreadful Dating

One of my favorite shows for a period of time was Glee. Yeah, yeah, I know, shocker. But, I will say that the first season was great; the second was alright; the third was meh; the fourth picked things up, the firth, well I don't know what really happened there; but the sixth was just gold all over again. Yes, I watched every season. Several times over. I'll even be honest and say I was an active editor on the glee wiki page. Let's all move on from the judgment now. Anyway, one of the cornerstones of Glee was the meaning behind what the actual word glee meant. But, as you watched the show, you realized that Glee was much more than just joy. It was also anger. Sadness. Regret. Hope. Loss. Pain. New Beginnings. Love. What opening yourself up to joy really meant was opening yourself to every single human emotion. It was never going to be easy or expected, but by opening yourself up to joy you could open yourself up to a life that had been lived. And just like ...

One of my favorite shows is Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. Seriously, if you haven't watched it, go watch it after reading this. I'd normally say go watch it all before finishing this, but it's too good for me to compete against. Can't have you guys being disappointed with my stuff after. Seriously, it's that good. What I got from Crazy Ex was one of my favorite songs that I really can connect with. No, not that one . This one: And it's absolutely true. Life does not make narrative sense. Everything just seems so random and barely put together. And in online dating it makes even less sense. Because here we were the weekend Chris was supposed to be here and no messages from him. Like the entire Friday he was supposed to fly out, I was on pins and needles. When was he gonna message me? Was he gonna call? Was I supposed to pick him up from the airport? Would he randomly show up at my apartment even though he didn't know where I lived but Seattle doesn't have...

Online dating is a huge gamble. You never know what's going to happen or who you're going to run into. I've run into professors, friends, and even people's husbands. Yeah, I know. Don't worry, there will be time for those stories as well. However, while you might meet many people there's also the biggest possibility. You're not going to meet anyone. Getting ghosted is a terrible experience. What's worse about getting ghosted is when you've offered all the goodies and get ghosted. You see, when that happens every single thought runs through your mind. Was I ugly? Boring? Were they just fishing for pics? Am I going to die alone? Seriously, there have only been a few times in my life when I've completely questioned my abilities. Once was when I didn't get into UC Berkeley, my dream school. Another was when I caved and hooked up with a friend and neither one of us came. And about two years ago, it was with Taylor. I matched with ...

So, welcome to another multi-part story. These are fun, right? I rip off all the bandages and we all do some group therapy together. I've actually debated about posting this one or not. Why, you ask? Because no one likes looking like a complete fool. It's fun putting yourself out there, but like, really putting yourself out there when you have egg on your face? So, it took me a while from going from ranting FB post, to fully coherent explanation. But, we're here folks. I'm excited, scared, and my tummy rumbling (so, that last one might be because of prune juice, but whatever). I will say, other than hesitating because I had egg on my face, I hesitated sharing this story for a few other reasons. First, because I never have time to write. Second, every good story has some suspense to build it up. Finally, because even looking back on it I'm still just shooketh that it happened. So, strap yourselves in, grab some churros, and let's go on this journey of...

In case you've been living under a rock for the past year, or like me have an ever growing list of movies and shows to get through (hey, if you do have some recommendations send them my way, I'll get to them), you might not know that 2018 saw Netflix roll out a crap-ton of teen rom-coms. And honestly, who doesn't love a good teen rom-com? All the emotions are ramped up to 11. Everything is life or death. And, I get to relive the glorious trauma and flashbacks of my Senior Prom over and over again. Trust me, seeing flat-assed suburban kids trying to shake it to some Pussycat Dolls is pretty scarring. One of my favorite 2018 teen movies was: To All the Boys I've Loved Before. You should definitely check it out as well as the book, of the same name. Seriously, stop reading this post now and go read and watch it and then come back. Okay, good. We're on the same page now. Seriously, it's a cute story. The movie, which I may or may not have already seen like 6...

I've always been an ambitious kid. Never one to quit too early or take the easy road. Hell, the road I usually end up taking isn't even on the map and you best believe I'm too prideful to ask for help. So, as part of my ambition is my need to write creatively. It's definitely not just a desire. It's like in my head there are thousands of words, stories, and characters that need to breathe on a page. Trust me, the normal voices in my head aren't that needy. In order to not go crazy and sustain this need, I write when I can. I will be the first to say that I am not the best and even when I do write, I am not consistent. Throughout high school and college I created an account on Fiction Press as an outlet for the characters that simply could not wait. I will say I've done some work over there. If you're interested, drop me a line and I will share the wonders of my work. However, Fiction Press wasn't enough. I also had an overflowing a...

Last winter I branched out from the normal guys I go for. Now, I won't say I have a particular type, BUT, I probably do. I usually go for guys close to my age, tall, who are driven. No, you don't need a four-year degree and letters after your name, but you do need to have a plan and direction. Seriously, Sallie Mae doesn't have time for me dicking around. This time, I decided I would go for some older guys. I have experience with some guys way beyond my years, but I don't make it a common thing. Not to say they don't come after me, but unless you're old, hot, and have money, I probably won't settle down. So I set up a date with a guy in his early 40s and mentally prepared myself for the coffee we were going to get. Now, I need to preface this date with some backstory that resulted in my naivety. I spent the first 21 years of my life in California and everyone in the suburbs spoke the same. i didn't think I spoke with an accent at any point in...

This is the story of my first time. Well, my first time getting attention from a guy. We don't have the time to be breaking down my first time with a guy. Or, maybe we do. My post would probably last longer than my first time. I was 14 the first time a guy noticed me in a sexual way. I wasn't the popular kid growing up. However, when living in Conservative White Suburbia, USA, it's hard to be the popular kid when you're brown, fat, and poor. To top it off, I was nerdy. So, growing up I didn't have a lot of friends and I had some bullies. But didn't everyone? Anyway, I didn't know I was gay for a while. Probably not until I was 13 or 14 and I KNEW what the word gay meant. I did know for a while that I was different. I couldn't put my finger on it, but I felt it. By the time I started high school, I knew I liked guys.* However, since I lived in Conservative White Suburbia, USA, I wasn't about to come out to people at the tender age of 14. For ...